View from the Prairie Box

I’ve been taking pictures for an upcoming capital campaign project for Zion. Most of my photos should be trashed as they turned out quite grainy and without great focal points. My excuse is that I have never taken a photography class and that I haven’t even read through the owner’s manual for my camera. Nonetheless, I love taking pictures and plan to improve my skills as time goes by. My favorite subjects are children (especially the ones that belong to me and my friends!), which explains this photo here. I tried to be impartial while snapping shots of our three year olds Sunday School class, but I couldn’t help but take extra photos of my favorite boys, Nathan and Andrew. And though this photograph is by no means extraordinary, the subject is! Nathan is captured at his mischievous best, proudly displaying his work for the camera.

It’s the end of an era. No more Horn Creek for PYA.

v. en·joyed, en·joy·ing, en·joys

1. To receive pleasure or satisfaction from.
2. To have the use or benefit of

• Online Read: Upon This Rock
• On DVD: Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Complete Third Season (Slim Set)
• During spare moments: The Price of Motherhood: Why the Most Important Job in the World Is Still the Least Valued
• For V-Day: Date Night

She’s asleep. Under the pastel crocheted baby blanket I made several years ago. It may not make it through these teething days, where she vigorously pulls its threads over her shiny new baby tiger teeth. But for now it’s doing its job, keeping her warm as she drifts off to Dreamland for her afternoon nap.

He’s asleep, too. Under the queen-size sheet from Penneys, under the navy blue down comforter, under another crocheted blanket, made many moons ago. I really haven’t made that many blankets. It just so happens that my two favorite people are being covered by them now. (What a nice feeling.) Poor guy—he’s sick. Recovering actually, from two days of fever and body aches.

And I wonder, why am I not sleeping?

Before long she’ll be awake again and our familiar cycle, sleep/wake/eat/play, will continue and I’ll curse the precious moments I wiled away in the face of the iMac. No fever, few body aches, but I’ve got a cold raising cain in my sinuses. At 3:30am I thought someone had the bones of my face in a vise-grip, threatening me with a long painful death-by-congestion. Three pillows, two Sudafed, one extra-strength Tylenol and one hour later I was sleeping like a log, awakened only by the baby voice across the hall at 7:45.

It’s been an interesting experiment, caring for a baby while feeling sick—and caring for an even sicker husband. And that’s why I’m still staring down the computer screen, luxuriating in personal emails and random articles. In an hour I may be hanging my head in exhaustion while pushing bitefuls of chicken and peas in Livia’s direction, but at least I will have had this. This me-time. This exposure to the outside world. I will have had you and you will have had me and I will have felt like a part of society again.

God bless the internet.

The Many Faces of Andrew, 2004-2005

After becoming a mother I find myself paying more attention to strangers. Though sometimes I am more suspicious of them (like the man at Russ’s grocery store who smiled at Livia and me one too many times) but overall I find myself, how can I say this?, bonding with them. The mothers, that is.

Livia had her nine month checkup with our pediatrician today. (If I haven’t said this before, let me say it now: I LOVE our pediatrician.) Sitting in the waiting room, a fellow mother struck up a conversation and before you know it, we’ve compared notes on babies chewing food, babies climbing on furniture and babies excessively wearing pink clothes. Instant bond. Our nine month old daughters, sitting peacefully in our laps, hardly looked at each other, but the moms? Well, we had a lot to talk about. Fast forward forty minutes, we’re walking down the office corridor, pass by another mama and child and Hello’s are exchanged. Warm, smiley, gracious and understanding hellos. Nice Hello’s.

A brotherhood of mothers exists. Sure, we may disagree on how to get your baby to sleep, what and when to feed your infant, and whether or not your wee one should sit through the church service with you, but still one thing in common holds us together: we are mothers. We understand what it’s like to clean up bodily fluids from the floor, high chair, and every shirt worn everyday. We know what it means to put someone else’s needs and desires above your own. We are used to cleaning the dishes, running the laundry and sending email as fast as possible during a two hour nap. And we know how disappointing it can be when the two hour nap morphs into one that’s only 45 minutes long!

No one told me about this brotherhood, but I continue to discover its importance with each passing day. Those who have mothered before me offer gracious advice and wisdom honed from years of experience. Those who mother alongside me give listening ears, shoulders to cry on and the confidence to continue on in my calling. Thank you, Mom, and thank you, moms. I do appreciate you.

A man that take a vacation day to allow his wife to SLEEP IN while he feeds and plays with the baby.

I love you, Jeremy Tredway.

At 5:55pm on a Wednesday afternoon, Livia can get anything her little heart desires. Right now she’s sitting on the computer desk, facing me and giving me a good dose of saliva by munching away at my Medic Alert necklace. What ever you want, child… Whatever you want. Daddy will be home soon.

Some days…

Dear Livia,

Yesterday I took your mobile down. I suppose I could’ve picked a better time to do it than when you laid down for your afternoon nap. When I removed the colorful characters from above your head you looked at me like, What are you doing, crazy lady? Don’t you know I NEED that? I had to fight the sentimental feelings (the same ones I’m fighting now as I write this letter) because I do want you to get bigger and I do want you to grow older, even though I say I don’t. Right now your future is mine, and I am excited for each day. And for this moment, the sweet mobile is put away until another Tredway baby arrives or until a little Lawton is born. Feel free to safely stand up in your crib, should the desire seize you, whenever the time is right.

I imagine you’ll be pulling yourself upright soon since you began standing a few short weeks ago. As you stood at our coffeetable—the same one your grandfather scooted around generations ago—your little legs shook, your hands tightly clasped the tabletop, and your eyes shone with pride. It was adorable and it was an answer to prayer; I was just hoping you’d master a new technique before we went in for your 9 month checkup. No crawling as of yet, though you are choosing to tolerate tummy time a little more now. The jury is out as to whether you’ll walk or crawl first. Either way we’re going to have to clean the floors much better than we do now! My hearts about stops when you choke on a Cheerio or when I imagine you putting small objects in your mouth. Motherhood is full of potential worries like that!

Livia, you now have a full blown personality, complete with a mini temper and a joyful soul. You laugh with pure glee at funny images like Daddy twirling in the kitchen and at invisible images that only reside in your mind. You bounce and kick your legs with happy vigor when something fancies you. On the other hand, you’ve shown an amazing flair for drama (like your Mom, sigh) when you burst into tears after a toy’s been taken away. I first noticed this ability at WalMart. You had been sucking on a C.D. case (it was either Disney’s Greatest, Volume 1, or Derek Webb’s She Must and Shall Go Free, I can’t remember which) when the album fell into the shopping cart. Unsure of whether you should’ve been mouthing the potentially germ-infested article in the first place, I chose to ignore the mishap and then guess what happened? You, my normally contented and complacent child, burst into tears like someone had pinched your hand hard! I was momentarily stunned and on reflex almost reached down to retrieve your “toy.” I quickly stopped myself, afterall I didn’t want you to suck on the C.D., but you really surprised me! The tears looked so genuine and so intense, not at all this fake whining that I see in some babies. Anyhow, a new side of you has emerged and I, the mother who loves you incredibly, am fully enjoying it.

Your dad and I still sit and watch you for entertainment. Whether you’re blowing spit bubbles and babbling loudly or whether you’re sucking your fingers and pulling on your hair while being rocked to sleep, we simply adore you. You are ours and we praise God for you.

Love always,
Mama

I want to post something new and witty, something fun for you all to read, but I just can’t squeak anything out today. So it’s comment time once again.

What is one website (blog, news, etc) you visit daily? If it’s already been listed, leave another one.