Livia said some things tonight that were hurtful to me as a mother. Frankly, I didn’t think I’d hear things like that until she was 14 or so, but perhaps I should have known better considering her strong will. Whenever I’m thrown into a new situation parenting-wise, it always takes me awhile to figure out an appropriate response. Do I discipline for this? If so, how? Do I simply ignore this behavior? Do I give an explanation and a warning this time around? I was actually taken aback by what Liv said and had to stop to consider how very little she understood the implications of her words. (For those of you who are curious, her comments related to adoption.)

After thinking about our little situation that had potential to brew into something very unlovely, I realized, Hey! I’m the parent here! I’m in charge, not this pint-sized punkin. Livia is a child, she doesn’t know what I know and understand what I understand. It’s my job to act like, speak like, and protect her like an adult.

I felt incredibly God-ordained in my role in that moment. Even more than that, I felt like I understood just the smallest bit of what God feels for us, his children. How many times have I turned away from his love? Over and over and over. How many times have I thought, spoken or acted in ways that were dishonoring to him? How often do I say ridiculous things that distort truth? All. the. time. God stands over me, in his infinite wisdom and love, and is as steady as a rock. He doesn’t change like the shifting shadows (James 1:17). He doesn’t treat me in the way I deserve to be treated when I’m foolish and childish, but extends limitless compassion and grace to me (Psalm 103:8-10). His love is steadfast and never ceases (Lamentations 3:22).

As I was considering all this tonight I was reminded about something great and wonderful today, something I almost forgot about. At lunchtime I needed to take Livia to preschool and run a few other errands. But I’ve been feeling super crappy with a bronchial infection and emotionally I wasn’t doing so well. Once we were loaded in the car I started crying in frustration. After a few minutes, Livia began to pray out loud: “Dear God, please take care of Mommy and heal her cold…” I can’t remember the rest of the prayer. I just know I was impressed by her sensitivity and the fact that she knew she could turn to God in spontaneous prayer, that God would take care of these problems.

Thank you, God, for loving us so incredibly—you have given us blessings we do not deserve. Thank you especially for Jesus, who died on the cross so that we, who are so childish and full of selfishness, can spend eternity with you. Help me to be more like you, to love my child the way you love me.