As a small child at a private Christian school I ruined Christmas for another student: I told her (gasp!) that Santa Claus does not exist.
I’m pretty sure this tragedy evoked the one and only phone call home from one of my schoolteachers. She told my mom to make me stop telling kids that Santa wasn’t real. I believe Mom told her that I was just speaking the truth. Ha!
As you can tell, I didn’t grow up believing in Santa. In our house, we Believed in a Savior who was born on Christmas Day—and I must say, we didn’t even Pretend in Santa. Now, I kind of like the idea of pretending in the magical fat guy who drives a reindeer sleigh and lives with elves in the North Pole. I’m not at all opposed to letting Livia pose with Mr. Claus for a pic this month (though we really don’t have the money to do it this year) or to decorating with cute Santa things around the house. But overall, I have no intentions of telling her Santa Claus is real.
Furthermore, it cracks me up when a kid (like me) can no longer hold the truth about the myth inside and whoops! tells the other kids. Sorry, Santa just isn’t real… But Merry Christmas anyhow!
*Here’s to Megan and her sanity in a house full of Santa-believers ;)
17 Comments
Renae Dec 10, 2004 11:35 AM
Ha!
My friend Trish grew up in a Santa-free house. In third grade or so, another girl decided that Show and Tell would be a good time to tell the rest of the class about her recent discovery–that Santa isn’t real. All Trish could do was think, “Good grief, Becky, you don’t tell the whole class! I’ve been sitting on this information for years!”
Lindsey Dec 10, 2004 3:16 PM
I was also the one to enlighten my entire second-grade class during a reading of “The Polar Express” that Santa is in fact, very fake, its your parents that pretend to be Santa and Rudolph does not have a red nose. I think I was responsible for a lot of sad, little children that day, but at least I didn’t try to evangelize them in the same shot.
Jeannette Dec 10, 2004 4:01 PM
I grew up in a Santa-free house, too, and when my mom took us to the mall at Christmas time when we were really little, I loudly asked her, “Who’s that funny man in a red suit?” (ANd probably everyone around her was thinking–what?! THe little girl doesn’t know who Santa is!?!?) We weren’t even allowed to sing Rudolph at home!
I think I’m like you, Rebecca. It’s a fun game. I’m never going to tell my kids Santa is real. But I LIKE pretending in the elves and cookies and singing Santa songs.
Jeremy Dec 10, 2004 4:32 PM
Hey sweetie, we should probably revisit this topic before our little pumpkin gets too old. I’m not so sure I want to deny her the magical mystery of Santa. I think the position that belief-in-Santa and belief-of-Christ are incompatible might be a false dichotomy. Of course, my ears are open to dissenting views.
Megan Dec 10, 2004 5:25 PM
Ah, Jeremy – you and my husband sit on the same side on this one. The thing that is really weird, though, is that Craig really doesn’t want to celebrate any holidays, yet since we are (I like to celebrate holidays), we should do Santa. I don’t get it.
I made all my points already on my blog (see above), but my main thoughts were 1) it’s lying. It’s not simply telling a little joke that gets resolved, it’s perpetuating an out and out lie that may or may not be devestating to said children when kids like mine (sorry, everyone) tell them the (gasp) truth.
Point #2 is that Santa isn’t on a budget. Unless you all have unlimited resources, and I’m guessing maybe you don’t (I don’t know you, maybe you do), Santa is going to be expected to deliver. Toys. Lots of expensive toys. He isn’t restricted to one $20 gift per child plus one small gift from each sibling. He isn’t responsible for cleaning litter boxes and he doesn’t care if he gives age inappropriate toys. When your little girl gets old enough to ask for things like cats and motorized jeep cars and stuff like that, from Santa, you then have to decide whether to tell the truth about Santa or say that Santa can’t or doesn’t want to or whatever…
Anyway, there is my dissenting view, for whatever that’s worth (maybe not much). My kids are currently enjoying pretending that Santa is real, but are understanding that he is indeed a pretend character much like Winnie the Pooh or some such. Guess I need to update that blog…
Jeremy Dec 10, 2004 6:09 PM
Megan, thanks for your comment. Your second point, in particular, sounds most convincing. I hadn’t yet considered the dilemma of children’s expectations. I wonder how I reconciled the descrepancies when I was a child—perhaps I should ask my parents.
Your first point, however, may not be so poignant. I’m still wrestling with whether all untrue statements should be considered lies. Even though I have my doubts, I don’t think I should argue this point yet, lest I lead anyone astray with false teaching.
I’m not certain I share your husband’s beliefs or not. I can say, for certain though, that I do want to celebrate all sorts of holidays. I feel they’re a special way to enjoy God’s gift of life.
I like the idea of pretending that Santa is real. The imagery and mythology of the legend (at least the older aspects, not the newer glitz) seem to be quite magical and quite perfect for children’s hearts and minds. Perhaps that’s the simple answer I’m looking for.
Serven Dec 10, 2004 6:17 PM
Not all “untruths” are lies.
Bethany Dec 10, 2004 8:43 PM
I too was one of those kids who informed another child in 2nd grade that Santa wasn’t real….and then was made to apologize to the girl. I don’t remember when I figured out that Santa didn’t exist. I’m pretty sure my parents never sat me down and told me in so many words. Santa was talked of, and we had stockings that were “magically” full of little presents/candy Christmas morning, but there was never a real emphasis on Santa. I certainly wasn’t traumatized when I found out it wasn’t true, just like I wasn’t tramatized when I found out other fairy tales my parents/adults told me aren’t true in the literal sense.
Jacinda Dec 11, 2004 12:26 PM
Who says Santa HAS to bring the “expected” gift, anyway? My son is three. I have told him on numerous occasions that “Santa is not real” (and when he asks why McDonald’s has food I tell him “they want our money”). Yet the kids at preschool tell him otherwise, and he keeps asking me again because of this disjointed information. There will be a visit from Santa at our grandmother’s on Christmas Day, and he will bear a present, but it’s not any of the things that Torrin has asked for. It cost less than ten dollars. If he asks who Santa is, I’ll tell him that it’s Bob, just like the man at the mall is just a guy playing pretend. At three, he’s old enough to know that it is fun to play pretend, even if he knows that what he is pretending is not the truth.
bobw Dec 11, 2004 12:39 PM
would it ruin it for you if I told you Jesus probably wasnt born on Christmas day? ;-)
kerri Dec 11, 2004 4:44 PM
i’m bethany’s mom (see one of the comments above). In dealing with the Santa issue, we followed the example of my parents: “santa” filled your stocking with a few trifles (usually an orange and a small toy), but the things that you really were excited about were from your family. I don’t exactly remember when I found out that Santa wasn’t real; it wasn’t a big deal, partly because he never brought you anything that great anyway.
We did the same with our kids; didn’t ban Santa, but made sure to emphasize the reason for Christmas, and let them find out on their own (or, as happened most of the time, from an older sibling). When the kid who was finding out the truth would come and ask me if Santa was real, I would usually turn it around to them: “What do you think?” This gave them the opportunity to continue “believing”, if they were not quite ready to give it up, or to survey the facts and decide that Santa wasn’t real. If they pressed me, I told them that it was a fun make-believe thing at Christmas.
This approach has worked reasonably well….through seven reasonably well-adjusted children (so far, anyway…..)!
Jeannette Dec 11, 2004 4:44 PM
WHAT!? ALL this hype for NUTHIN’!!!! I’m crushed.
Anna Dec 11, 2004 8:19 PM
A Santa comment from an occasional lurker who grew up believing in Santa….I think if you choose to have Santa in your house he can be who you make him to be. The idea of Santa added a little extra surprise and fun to Christmas morning but at the same time we remembered the real focus of the season. I think that Santa can definitely be on a budget if you are. The stocking is filled with an orange, a few candies, a little toy, a book. Just a few little things. THE present still came from mom and dad under the tree. Santa didnt fulfill all my expensive childhood desires but he was still magical. And the fact that my friend’s Santa brought a more expensive present never really mattered…I dont think I even really knew. The point was that I got a few gifts.
Megan Dec 11, 2004 8:46 PM
There’s nothing like being misunderstood. And thanks, especially to Doug and bobw for doing so. :) Anyway, I only commented at all because Jeremy said he was interested in a dissenting view. I’ll leave you all alone now to agree with each other all you want.
rubykate Dec 11, 2004 10:44 PM
I also grew up believing in Santa. I also agree with Anna. I don’t know when I realized that Santa wasn’t real, but it didn’t make me go off the deep end. Even now, although Jen and I are in our 20s and our parents in their 50-60s, we still do the Santa thing. Mom and Dad do it for us and we do it for them. When we were kids we other presents from Santa but now we just stick to stockings. There is something magical about Santa and children need things that spark their imagination. Plus I don’t think that some people give kids enough credit for understanding the difference between Santa and Christmas and Jesus and Christmas. If and when I have kids, we’ll definatly do the Santa thing.
RT Dec 12, 2004 12:15 AM
Great discussion all! : )
For further clarification, Santa is a lot of fun and I do want to stimulate my child’s imagination. I just don’t plan on telling my kids that he is REAL, that’s all.
We just finished watching “Elf” with Will Ferrell. Hee hee. Both fun and funny. Good little Christmas flick.
Jeannette Dec 20, 2004 3:46 PM
This post on chattablogs made me think of the Santa discussion.
http://oriondark.chattablogs.com/archives/019404.html
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